Confirmation!

Earlier today Rob "Tyger"Ruben posted on the Special Ops forum that we were to contact a certain person via email/phone to book rooms and flights. So I did.

I received an email response with flight options and asking me to select a roommate. So I made my choices. I'll be leaving from the Kingston Airport at noon on June 21 and returning on June 25. I also chose to room with Kole "Cpt. Obvious" Maxwell.

Seems one of the other staff called "dibs" on him and I sent the travel agent another email explaining that. Her response was to ask if I wanted my own room. Well, DUH!!

So now everything is booked but I still need to get my passport... Hopefully there's no problem with that.

In other news, Logan was sent home today with a fever and a cough. He's got a flu bug 10 days before he's the ring bearer at Carmen's wedding. He'll be staying home this week to recover.

Carrie is doing Ok. Her back is still bothering her, but with Osteopenia I guess that's to be expected.

Fear.

So here's the deal.

A little over 10 years ago I read my grandpa (mom's dad) Frank's tea leaves and saw that he wouldn't see the spring. Come early February the following year we got the call. He passed in his sleep while his favorite show was on.

In 2002 I got the call grandpa(dad's dad) "Doc" passed away. His wasn't so pleasant. He had been in the hospital being eaten away by cancer. The meds had him messed up.

This year my dad's mother passed away. She was 84 and in the hospital with a broken hip, or that's what I knew anyway. When my half sister Erika informed me grandma has died this past Monday it was the first time I had heard that she had 2 tumors. I don't know what kind or where but she was a smoker so I'd expect them to be in her lungs.

I called my dad to see how things were going. He sounded like he was holding up ok and told me that they were packing up grandmas stuff. I also found out that he was "having health problems" of his own. What's disturbing about that is the fact that a few years ago he beat throat cancer. Now he's waiting to hear back from some specialist. He used the word specialists but at the same time I heard him say Oncologist.

So here's the score, grandpa Frank beat his prostate cancer, dad beat his throat cancer. Grandpa Doc lost to cancer. My mom's sister, Agnes, was taken by cancer. Grandma Viv and cancer? No real idea.

My mom's mom, Agnes, is still alive and seems healthy as a horse. I'm definitely worried about her.

I'm worried about myself too. Can you blame me? I think it's time I set up an appointment to get a complete physical.

Good bye gandma Viv

I just found out my grandmother(on my dads side) passed away on Monday.
I wish I could go to the funeral but I can't . My dads side of the family isn't what I'd call tight so over the last 10 years we'd all pass letters/emails maybe every 6 months or so but it's still a shock and it still hurts.

She'd been sick for a while, 2 tumors. She broke her hip and was in the hospital. She was having trouble recognizing people due to the amount of painkillers she was on and she passed away in her sleep.

She never got to meet her great grandson or her granddaughter in-law.

At least she passed peacefully and can join grandpa Doc.

WOOOOOOT!!!!!

As I mentioned last time (yesterday) Special Ops is having the Elite Weekend. I was so hopping to go. It looks like I am!!!

As a gift to the forum staff they have set 10 special slots aside. I'm not going into cost details because I'm still not sure what info that they want made public. But I will say it's a wicked awesome deal.

All I need now it to get my passport, and even that seems to be falling into place. I was disheartened to hear that it would be 10 weeks to get it if I mail all the info in. It doesn't take a math wiz to see that won't work. So I made some calls. If I apply in person I can have it in 10 DAYS. Carrie has a doctors appointment on the 14th so I can get him to sign the last two things. Then on May 30 my sister, Paula, is going to arrive in Ottawa for my other sisters wedding. Mom is picking her up. When she does that I'll be going for my passport!

Do I get a Tippmann X-7 like the regular players? Sadly, no. But that's OK becasue of some of the other benefits I get( again not going into detail). But I do get some other stuff I can mention:

• Most meals provided by Special Ops
• Free Elite camo set
• Free Elite tee-shirt
• Play in the big game on Sun. w/free paint

I spent most of last night in a bit of a fog over this. Today I'm nearly vibrating with excitement! I'm almost as thrilled about this as I was when Logan was born.

To those of you that are going, I will see you there (barring passport problems). Those that aren't, keep your fingers crossed for the web cams. Don't worry, I'll be bringing my digital camera and there will be LOTS of photos. I've got a 1GB card in the cam and can take over 8000 pics!

No news is good news I guess.

It's not that things haven't been happening, just nothing major.

My back is slowly recovering. My doctor said I should get into physiotherapy and prescribed me some Novo-Cycloprine (muscle relaxers). I'm not keen on taking them, I dislike taking meds unless I absolutely have to, but at least they are better than the morphine. I've also applied to receive disability support. I doubt I'll get it but it would certainly help us financially.

Carrie has been diagnosed with some kind of osteoporosis of her spine. There's another name for it but neither of us can remember what it is. She's been put on calcium supplements and vitamin D. Hopefully that will fix her up. It explains her back/hip problems.

Logan has been enjoying the nice weather we've finally been getting. He's spending more time outside playing with kids in the neighborhood, flying (trying anyway) his kite, riding his bike and scooter. Lately he's also taken to watching Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. Being in grade one he has no real clue what any of the answers are but is fun to listen to him try. His answers tend to be things he's heard in commercials or something Carrie and I have said while he's watching.

Special Ops Paintball is hosting an Elite Weekend game on their new field. Details about the weekend can be found here. If you have Google Earth (or something similar) the coordinates are 40°26' 42"N 112°24'02"W. Forum members have been making suggestions on what to put into the field. It looks like they may put up some web cams for the weekend. That would be so freaking awesome for the thousands of us that can't go.

It's too bad it's such a small game. 60 spots total, and only 30 were available for purchase. The other 30 are up for grabs in a draw. I'd love to go this year but time, my back and the cost won't let me. To buy a spot it's $2700.00 US for non Special Ops Brigade members. Because I'm a member it's would only be $1700.00. But I still need airfare, accommodations, food and a passport. Total bill for me in Canadian funds is about $3600.00. It could take up to 10 weeks for my passport to be processed which is well after the weekend.

Easter rant

I'd like to know what assclown decided that giving kids gifts on Easter was a good idea? Seriously. Christmas is bad enough with kids screaming "I want" all day everyday for the 90 days prior to December 25. I'd like to find the son of a bitch and kick him square in the balls.

It's bad enough that the religious folk will get the kids a new set of dress clothes to attend church functions/family gatherings. But giving a kid a baseball glove or a new bike? Blow it out your ass!

When I was growing up we got chocolate. That was pretty much it. Hell I think we were afraid to ask for anything else. The day after easter was always fun in school though: "What did you get?"

"I got a bike and a bat."
"I got a remote control car and $50.00"
"I got a puppy, some clothes, a kite, and a bajillion jelly beans."
"I got some chocolate." - me
"That's it? Are you poor or do your parents just hate you?"

At that point I wanted to kill them. As I got older I learned to ignore them. Now I want to kill them again. Why? They are now parents that insist on giving their children presents from the Easter Bunny.

On the Spec Ops forum one of the members is a tad miffed that he didn't get the paintball gear he asked for. BOO FUCKING HOO TO YOU! Be glad you had family to be with. I've spent several holidays on my own, Christmas, Easter, Thanks Giving... And you have the balls to whine because you didn't get a damned HPA tank?

At this point I'd like to thank Corporate America for turning another family based holiday into a "gimmiefest". Thank you for decaying good family values.

Don't get me wrong, I'm sure as hell not a "Charlie Church" but I do have my own brand of spirituality. I believe that love cannot be wrong regardless of age (with in reason) or sexuality. I understand the difference between right and wrong and try my best to live by what's right. There's more but for me it's something I feel and can't put into words.

What I don't believe in is all this Capitalism/Consumerism that warps the minds of the nations youth. I'm not against Capitalism/Consumerism. I'm against the fact that they takes days that are considered sacred and turns them into cash cows.

What really chaps my ass is that all these "money days" are based on Catholic/Christian holidays. When's the last time you saw a 60 day sales campaign targeting Chanukah, Ramadan, or Cinco de Mayo?

The church doesn't like gays? Well I don't like your gimmie holidays.

Almost completly mobile!

Yup. I'm a lot better now. I can walk Logan to and from school. Mind you I'm still having pain when I put socks and shoes on. The bending isn't the problem, it's the straightening out and of course some quick movements.

When I stand up it feels as though I have a major ass cramp. My right butt cheek is the worst and feels like I've been shot with a nail gun. The pain moves into my thigh and cramps my calf too. The left side isn't as bad. It feels like a cramp but stops about mid thigh.

Logan broke his glasses on Friday. We needed to pick up some paperwork at ODSP so I (stupidly) walked up there. Normally the walk takes me about 45 minutes round trip. This time it took me 90 minutes. I was good on the way up there, aside from a dog biting me. Nothing major, it freaked out at my coat blowing in the wind, tried to get the "monster" and ended up getting my pant leg. All I felt was a pinch.

Three quarters of the way home the pain in my back and in my leg was enough to bring me to tears. When I got home I took 2 Tylenol with codeine and laid down for an hour and a half. I spent the rest of the weekend feeling like I'd run back to back marathons.

I got an email from my sister Paula a few days ago. Looks like she's coming for a visit. She'll be in the area for about a week. It'll be good to see here again.

There's also a rumor that my mom's brother may be coming for a visit as well.

I've been jotting down some ideas on how to expand my little story. The only thing that seems consistent to all of them is that what's written is a dream. I suppose that's ok but a part of me feels it's a bit of a cliché. Kind of like Snoopy and "It was a dark and stormy night".

Happy Birthday to me!

Yup I'm another year older as of today. And I am definitely feeling it. On Feb 26 I ended up in the hospital due to a severe muscle spasm.

I went in around 8:45 pm and was out by 4:30 am. When I arrived I was assessed and given 2 needles, one in each ass cheek, or what I think was Demerol and 3 percocetes. They left me be for an hour or so and tired to get me into a sitting position. It didn't work. So between 10 pm and 4 am they took some x-rays and said I was fine and I was given a total 4 shots of morphine.

I am still sore but I'm mobile. I can't put my socks on with out help. My back stiffens up if I'm sitting or standing too long. My right thigh has had a "Charley horse" for the last two days and I can't lift heavy objects.

I think I made the doctors nervous that night. I had a shit load of drugs in me and I wasn't even drowsy.

Tomorrow we celebrate mine and Logan's birthdays. He's having some of his friends over. Me with a bad back and ten kids in the house... Where did I put the morphine?

Leave a review...

Nearly another month since my last post.

What's been going on? Well, the Degus came of age yesterday and we took 6 of the babies to the pet store. So now we have the Mother (Itch) one baby female and a baby male. So we could have more Degus in the future.

We got a call from Logan's school today. He scraped his arm on the fence playing at recess. Nothing serious but it's about 5 or inches long. His teach cleaned it up and bandaged it. Took a few minutes to find is booster records and it looks like he shouldn't need a tetanus shot. We have a doctors appointment tomorrow so we'll get the cut looked and and a shot done if needed. Logan is still doing well in school. His last 2 spelling tests he's gotten 8/8! He was also selected as one of 50 kids to participate in the "Running and Reading Club". Every Tuesday they meet in the gym to read books and run laps. The goal is to get everyone to do a 5Km run as a "graduation".

Carrie's been doing ok. Her incision was and still is infected. She also had a kidney and bladder infection. She's very excited that WWE Smackdown is doing a house show in Kingston in May. Batista is supposed to be there so we'll be trying to get a pic of him signing the doll she got for her birthday.

Speaking of birthdays... It's only 15 days until Logan's and 16 until mine. Man I'm getting old.

Someone started a "short story" on the Special Ops Forum. Well, I tossed something based on a dream into the thread. Some asked me to develop it more and I did. With a size 10 font it's about 4.5 pages long in MS Word. My mother has read what I have and is telling me to keep going with it. I'm jotting down some ideas on where to go with it but so far nothing feels like it fits yet.

So... Here's what I have, any comments would be appreciated.

There was very little electric light, not because things needed to be hidden but because resources for such luxuries were hard to come by. The giant shape loomed out of the gray like the body of a dead bloated animal. Davis stared at it with a mixture of awe and terror wondering if it would actually fly. This and the other "savior" ships had been built as quickly as possible. He wasn't sure if they should bother with it though.

Davis had seen the footage with his own eyes several times and, like the others that had watched it with him, couldn't believe people could be that stupid. Nobody knew what branch of the government had made the video. What they did know was that it was real. The time stamp gave the date as 9.26.2001 and research confirmed that events seen in other areas of the footage had taken place.

He shook his head in disbelief and began his climb to his work section. His ship should be done some time around noon. After that a few final checks would be made and they'd try to leave the Earth behind. They'd be lucky if they didn't blow up on take off. Davis reached his section, grabbed his torch and began welding. He could see that some of the welds in this area couldn't even be called welds. He'd like to fix them but speed is what matters now according to the powers that be.

The footage was of Ground Zero. You could see the devastation everywhere you looked. Broken building, twisted aircraft, body parts. The cameraman panned and zoomed over the entire scene. You could hear people in the background yelling instructions and heavy equipment moving wreckage. Most people you could see were wearing coveralls and hard hats. But there was another figure that wore what appeared to be a hazmat suit.

The figure carried what looked like a GPS and a shovel. "It should be right about here", a slightly muffled voice said. The GPS disappeared into a bag and he began to dig. Several minutes passed before a clunk was heard. The figure began to enlarge the hole and stopped forty-five minutes later. "I need a hand", is heard from the figure and a second hazmat suit steps from behind the camera. They grunt and strain until a hiss of air is heard. A metal plate is lifted into view; it looks like it could be a door. There is witting and a logo on it. The wording can't be made out but the symbol for biohazard is easily recognized, even though it's damaged.

Davis is startled out of his reflection when he feels a hand placed on his shoulder. When he looks up form his work Davis can see it's is foreman.

"Davis, take a ten. We need to get a few more plates up here. It's bad enough to have a doctor welding but we don't need to lose you in an accident."

All Davis could do was reply, "Right". He headed off to grab a coffee. The sun was coming up and in many ways he wished it wouldn't. Regardless he knew it was going to be his last sunrise on Earth. He sipped his coffee and watched it.

Everyone knew what had happened on 9/11/01. What no one knew was that the US Government had a bio lab under the towers. The video proved that. Both the figures disappeared into the ground. Five, ten, then twenty five minutes passed before they re-emerged, both carrying a different canister. They approached the camera and you could see the biohazard warning again. Both appeared to be completely intact. The camera switched off.

That was over eighty years ago. Things seemed fine for the first twenty years. Saddam had been captured and hanged in 2006, Osama Bin Laden was captured and imprisoned in 2010. The truth was that things were about to go very wrong.

The video resumed in a lab. They inspected the canisters and could see the seal on one was damaged. As a safety precaution they exposed a rat to the canister. They observed the rat for weeks and it seemed perfectly healthy. They thought it was safe, they were wrong.

Davis knew now that the rat had become a carrier for the disease. The disease was designed to attack humans only with certain genomes, specifically anyone of Middle Eastern origin. The first real victim was a doctor of the lab. His symptoms were similar to SARS. It spread through New York quickly; anyone could be a carrier for it. Air travel was strictly monitored to try and stop the spread. No one seemed to notice only one group of people was affected. It wasn't until 2022 that other people began being affected. It had mutated to affect more people. In the beginning it had an 80% mortality rate in just one group of humans; the 2022 version was 85% globally.

His grandfather had been brought in on a cure attempt in 2025. Four years of work yielded some very promising results. There were protests that it needed further testing but the governments of the world demanded it be put into production immediately. In June of 2030 people lined up for miles waiting for the injection.

A staccato of gunfire came from the south east corner of the compound. Davis’ hand instinctively went to his hip for the ancient Colt 45 as he stood up to see what was happening. A small band of obviously deformed beings were trying to get in. Shamblers. He could see the snipers moving along the wall to deal with the situation. Davis counted 7 distinct cracks of the rifles and then the silence.

“I think you can relax now. They got all of them. Time to get back to work; the last five plates are in place. If you have a few minutes clean up any welds you thing need be fixed. But only if it isn’t going to take all day. I’d like to get off this dying rock today.”

Doesn’t he ever have anything different to say?, thought Davis. “We should be gone by 2 o’clock. If things check okay”, was all he could, and was expected, to say.

The steel looked like they fit together nicely. It would make the welding so much easier since he wouldn’t have to hunt for scraps to fill larger gaps.

Shamblers. They were becoming more aggressive and seemingly more intelligent. Davis wasn’t surprised about that, they were human after all.

The first reported Shambler sighting was in 2037. It was called a zombie at first. No one knew the truth back then and now those that do refuse to acknowledge it. Its source was the vaccine.

By 2032 approximately 15% of the population had been inoculated and the governments could see a change in the death tolls. They could also see a change in the births. Of those vaccinated less than a quarter would have a perfectly normal child. The majority had various degrees of deformities and defects. Significant numbers of which needed to be put to death, or died, shortly after entering the world. The few that survived lacked normal human intelligence. Most parents tried to deal with them; others abandoned them in deserted areas. They were ignored and left to themselves. The vaccines were stopped but the births continued.

These “non humans” began to reproduce on their own. They had become more like vermin than human, living in the dark unpleasant areas of the cities, eating garbage. They had the advantage of being immune to the disease. Nature decided to torture man a little bit more.

It was assumed by most that the “non humans” had devolved into the Shamblers. Years of study had shown otherwise. The vaccine had an effect on necrotizing fasciitis the Flesh Eating disease. It allowed the disease to take over the body without killing them. Their intelligence seemed to drop further; they were nearly mindless. The body required food and the virus wanted to spread, both are drawn to warm bodies. It was easy to see them as zombies. The infection spread fast, the “non humans” were easy targets for their own kind.

Davis looked over his handy work. The welds were good and he was making good time, he thought he’d be able to make some repairs in some other sections. First, though, it was time for a break and to get more welding rods. He climbed off of the ship and headed of to the break/supply room. He didn’t like going there even though there was a TV and a radio. They never played anything except the status of the Savior ships.

Davis sat down, looked over the boards and noted that one of the ships at his location, near Toronto, was going to be delayed by two weeks. Somehow the coolant for the engines had gotten in to the air system. The scrubbers had been destroyed and a new one had to be built from scratch. Stupidity or sabotage, Davis didn’t really care.

There was a news flash on the TV. The first ship from the New York facility had completed its final checks, was loaded with passengers and cleared for lift off.

Others came in to watch and pray for their safety. The countdown finished, the engines fired and slowly Savior Liberty lumbered into the sky. Shouts of joy rang out and people congratulated each other on a job well done, though they had no hand in the Liberty’s construction. Forty seconds later they were forced back to the reality of things when the first flash of fire erupted two thirds of the way down the ship. A second and a third fire was seen. An explosion ripped the belly of the ship off and the image went blank. In the silence of disbelief a voice was heard to say, “It could have been worse. They could have been on the ground”. Davis agreed, it was better to lose two thousand in one ship than everyone in the 15 ships at the facility.

Davis grabbed his rods and headed back to work, more melancholy than before. These ships were hope and that hope was shown to be a fragile bubble. Just as he was about to start work again word came to double and triple check everything and that Vancouver had a successful launch.

“Non humans” were still being born and discarded even though the laws stated they must be killed. That allowed the number of Shamblers to grow slowly. The big growth spurts came when they managed to get into a populated area.

Shamblers weren’t very fast but they did seem to display a pack like mentality. Once in a populated area, coincidence or not, they managed to separate the infirm, small children or the elderly. Fences and walls started to surround smaller towns’; large cities had problems with that. Aside from being impractical to wall in a major city Shamblers seemed to get into the sewer systems and storm drains. They took extra precautions, set up heavily armed patrols, installed heavy grating in the drainage systems. It worked for a while.

Then a little more than 5 years ago they suddenly became intelligent. They were still well below average human intelligence but they had learned some basics such as how to work door knobs and elevator buttons. They could get up the stairs but it was a slow process. They also figured out humans slept at night.

Patrols were increased in the cities. Populations condensed and moved to one corner of the city for defensive purposes and walls were erected. Populated areas were in constant communication with each other trying to track the larger groups of Shamblers. Things were getting bad, smaller towns fell as groups of several hundred attacked smaller out posts. The worst attack was eight months ago. It was estimated that a group of 1500 Shamblers took down a population of four times that size. With previous attack figures showing only twenty percent of people were killed out right this attack was a bad sign.

The lunch whistle blew. It’s about time, Davis thought. He stood up and stretched; his back popping. Looking around he could see that skin of the ship was almost done. As long as the internal checks were going well they might make the scheduled lift off time.

Davis sat at the lunch table chewing on his stale peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich. Scraps of conversation floated through the air. Some were talking about the attack this morning, others had heard the Texas facility had been wiped out by Shamblers or claimed it wasn’t true. People discussed how well the ships were progressing and how they looked forward lift off. No one mentioned the New York incident, acknowledging it would be tainting hope. It would take a lot of hope for 2100 ships, over four million people from Canada alone, to hit space.

Each country had decided on how to leave on its own. Both Canada and the US had similar plans, large quantities of smaller ships. The idea was it’s better to lose a small portion of the population in a single ship. India had chosen to use four ships to save their 150 million people. Two of their ships exploded, one on the ground.

Some of the inspectors had made their way into the lunch room and over to the status board. Everyone could hear clicking as status markers were moved around. The inspectors moved off to have their lunch and people swarmed the board. The majority of responses were groans and curses, few cheered. Davis waited and finished his lunch before checking the board, no point in getting banged around. Forty-five minutes later it was time to go back to work and that’s when he took a look. Ship 12, the one he had worked on for the last ten weeks, was listed as complete and cleared for boarding.

He headed back to his section to clean up his gear. People were already lining up for boarding. Protocols dictated that construction staff was to be boarded first to ensure a repair crew was available. With Davis being a General Practitioner as well he’d be among the first no matter what. He picked up his gear and handed it through the closest hatch for storage then went to his apartment for his suitcase.

As the ships neared completion they were loaded with equipment and provisions. It was like getting ready for a massive family camping trip. Roughing it would be an understatement and everyone knew it. The destination was Mars and the actual conditions there were still a bit on the harsh side.

Terraforming was still in it’s infancy in 2035 and it was expected to take eighty years for it to be complete. With barely fifty years having passed there should be enough water and oxygen there to support the scraps of the human race. At least that’s what the Government said. No one had been back to Mars since the project had begun but the equipment kept sending back regular reports. Things were progressing as they had been predicted.

It was closer to three o’clock before the passengers were loaded. Ears popped as the cabin pressurized, smaller children cried at the discomfort. The crew walked the aisles and ensured that harnesses where done up correctly and were as snug as they should be. Once out of the atmosphere people would be free to move around and use lap belts only during the six month flight.

The Captain announced that it was two minutes to lift off and the engines would be starting. A growl surged through the ship and the passengers yelped. The beast was awakening. Davis’ knuckles turned white as he gripped the armrests of his seat. Small screens around the cabin showed the countdown timer. With fifteen seconds left the growl became a roar and Davis closed his eyes.

The Captain announced liftoff. Davis felt himself pressed deep into the seat and gasped for air. His left arm began to hurt. He opened his eyes to see the woman next to him had grabbed on, tears on her cheek, terror in her eyes. It would be ten minutes before they broke through the atmosphere before it was quiet enough to try to console her, if they were lucky.

slackin'

So it's been nearly a month since my last update. Man I've been slacking.

What's been going on?





Well, our degu has had pups. They'll be 2 weeks old tomorrow. Now we have 9 degus total, Itch (the mother) and 8 babies. They are getting a lot more active and it's quite funny to see them bouncing around the cage. No her eye isn't normally like that. We just forgot to turn the red-eye reduction on.





Carrie had a tubal ligation on the 12th. She's doing fine although still a bit sore. The incisions for the laparoscope are healing well. The one in her belly button is a bit larger than the one on the waist line so it's healing a little slower.

Carries computer fried a few days ago. Looks like some of the capacitors on the motherboard blew out. Luckily for us we managed to get one for free from Freecycle. It came with a 1Ghz AMD processor, 200Mbs of ram and a 20 GB hard drive. I ended up having to reformat Carries 10GB hard drive to get the system up and running but it's doing fine now. All that needs to be done is replace the exhaust fan. It's a bit on the noisy side but should hold out until we can replace it.

We finally got some snow. Late last week we had a "storm" that dropped about 4 inches of snow on us. It's actually stuck around for a while. Down side is it's brought the cold along with it. I guess it's okay seeing as we had temps averaging about +10°C

Logan has been doing well in school. He's had 2 spelling tests now. His first he scored a 7/8 and on his second 8/8. His reading is coming along very well too. He's reading this over my shoulder as I type. It's cute but annoying at the same time. Thankfully it's almost bed time for him. That means he can read a bed time story to ME! He's also gotten a new snowsuit. the last one we got him was a reversible jacket. The zipper tab broke off and then it wouldn't stay done up. With it being as cold as it is now he needed one that would stay done up.

Well it looks like I need to make some Kool-aid and get someone to bed.

Saddam executed?

It's 10:13 pm ET. Saddam was to have been executed about 15 minutes ago. CNN is saying that 2 TV stations in Iraq are confirm his hanging has taken place. Until I see a body, I have my doubts.

While they were looking for him I seem to recall several doubles having been found/killed. At this point I wouldn't be surprised to learn that he is still alive. Maybe I'm a bit cynical on this but something just doesn't feel right about this.

I'm only 35 but I've seen some interesting things happen in history: The fall of the Berlin wall, the explosion of 2 space shuttles, fall of the World Trade Center, various assassinations/attempts, the fall of communism in Russia, massive devastation caused by natural events. I saw the capture of Saddam Hussein and knew that I was seeing more history unfolding in front of my eyes. This should be the continuation of that.

I don't think I can really explain what I'm feeling, or more precisely what I'm not feeling. I think the closest comparison I can give is like when I was a kid and I was told Santa wasn't real.

Saddam was captured 3 years ago. They say his influence in Iraq has diminished significantly. I guess now is the real test. All we can do is pray for whatever troops are over there, be they US, British or anywhere else that they remain safe. May the new year and Saddam's death bring them home.

As I've been typing this out I've been listening to CNN about this. They just reported that on Iraq station pegged Saddam's death at 10:05 pm ET the other one is saying that it was before 10:00... But news is starting to spread through the streets of Iraq.

Why I Hate Christmas

I love my family. I love my friends and I appreciate the message of unity and peace that this time of year is supposed to represent. But I still hate Christmas.

I hate it because of the week before and the 2 weeks after.

I despise shopping under the best of circumstances but you add the sheer insanity of a thousand people screaming, "OH MY GOD! 5 days until Christmas and I haven't bought anything for anyone!" Jam them into a mall of any size where things are on "sale"(I have my doubts about some items). I'd rather swallow a live block of Semtex and detonate it in my colon. It's a lot less painful.

Last night was, thankfully, the last of my Christmas shopping. The only reason I need to go back to the mall between now and the 25th is if I'm being paid a shit load of cash to kill someone or if zombies attack. Frankly I'd rather take my chances with the zombies.

This morning I took Logan to school. On my way back home I ran into the mother of a friend of Logan's. Niceties demanded I ask if she had finished her shopping yet and she replied with a, "No, I still haven't figured out what to get my husband."

Since we had seen her husband and son at the mall last night I asked if they were finished theirs. They were but her son was wanting to get his mom a special present. It seems he wants to get her a "Cemetery. That way you can see grandpa." That's a hell of a thought and a wish that can only come form a child.

I need a caffeine fix...

So I quit at Startek. I'm happy about that. Less stress. On the down side I'm unemployed again.
That's not all that bad. I'm looking into some of those work at home things. Maybe one of them will pan out. If it does I'll be sure to let people know.

Since I quit ODSP requires that I apply for Employment Insurance. Frankly I didn't want to because I knew I didn't have enough hours for it. But since they "require" that I do it, I did. The woman behind the counter thought I was nuts. Oh well. Lots of people think I'm nuts.

Logan got his report card the other day.
English: Read - B
Write - B
Oral - B


Math: Number sense and Numeration - B+
Measurement - B+
Patterning and algebra - B
Data Management and Probability - B


Science and Technology: B

Social Studies: B+

Health and P.E.: B

The Arts Music: B+

Visual Arts: C+

For his learning skills he got 6 Goods, 2 Excellents and 1 Satisfactory. The Satisfactory is for his conflict resolution. I guess drop kicking a kid doesn't work. Overall we're very happy with him. Hopefully he continues with his B average and quits drop kicking kids.

Santa comes in little more than a week. We got all of Logan's gifts, even if it means Carrie and I can't get anything for each other. We'll do what we can, but I'm not expecting much.

ODSP says they overpaid us because I was working even though all my pay stubs were submitted WELL BEFORE THEY WERE DUE. Fucking government. Two months in a row. First time was an overpayment of over $300.00, the second was over $400.00. Thankfully our rent is still getting paid.

I might quit.

I started my training at Startek on Sept 22 (or close to that date anyway). It was 3 weeks of classroom work, reading online lessons, doing role plays and testing. As I've said before I felt under trained.

After I started on the phones I was nervous of course. I struggled along with my classmates. I was getting used to how things worked and just starting to get a handle the Bell phone features. And that's about the time things started to change. I started to sleep less, eat less and began to feel sick to the stomach some mornings.

I was on the phones until Nov 8. That's when they pulled me aside and told me, not asked, that I was going to the sales cue. More training. And my stomach got worse.

As it stands right now I'm eating one meal a day (and it's a lot smaller than I would normally eat), I'm getting about 3 hours of sleep a night (sometimes less) and when I get out of bed in the morning I sometimes have a headache and always feel like I'm going to puke.

What's wrong with me? I have a good idea. My sister had the same problems when she was in school. She was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. I'm guessing my job is the source for mine.

I've worked in places I didn't like but I've never had this problem before. I've called in sick and today is the third day in a row. I'm going to the clinic today to talk to a doctor and I'm also going to call ODSP (Ontario Disability Support Program). I think I'm going to quit but I need to make sure it's not going to mess with our ODSP payments. I doubt ODSP would cut us off, especially if I have medical reasons.

I spent close to an hour this morning crying. Worried how Carrie would feel about it. We talked and she's fine with it. On one level I'm worried about what the rest of my family will think. On another level I really don't care. If they want to bitch and moan and call me a quitter then they can all go fuck themselves. They don't need to speak to me at all or ever again.

On top of all that Carrie's got three cracked ribs. She was house cleaning a couple of weeks ago and slipped in he socked feet. She banged up against the rocking chair and we figured she'd just bruise a bit. She went to the hospital yesterday because she was still in pain and having some difficulty breathing, getting out of bed and just moving around. They x-rayed her and found lots of swelling and three cracked ribs.

My headache is coming back. I think I'll go have some toast and tylenol.

Emo?

A while ago on the Spec Ops forum a member asked, "Why don't people like Emo Kids?"

Several members commented on how annoying this group of kids are. How they walk around all depressed, wearing black (usually female clothes no less), complain about how no-one likes them and why the cut themselves. His response to this was, "We just want to be left alone. You're all pissed because I'm an individual."

That made me laugh. I fail to see how dressing, listening to the same music and acting like the rest of the Emo Kids makes you an individual, weather you are a "true" emo or a poser.

For a while I pretty much left it at that. Then someone at work made a comment that reminded me of the Emo.

I have no problem with someone trying to express themselves. I grew up surrounded by punks and goths. I dealt with potheads, geeks, nerds and jocks. Preps and wannabes. I did things people thought I was nuts for doing. I was accused of being a skin head when I shaved my head the first time. But emos?

I have a hard time accepting a group that claims to be original when the first emo kids ever were seen around in October 2, 1950. Who are these kids? Everyone and their dog should know them. If you haven't guessed it's none other than Charlie Brown and the gang. Read the comics, you'll see what I mean.

You want people to like you? Then why the hell are you being an annoying ass clown and whining about it? I hate to break the news to you but the universe shits on everyone. You want proof? Try living in Halifax NS for 12 years and being deathly allergic to seafood. Quit cutting yourself. Maybe the extra blood that makes it to your brain will let you have an intelligent thought.

God.. "I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy because my life didn't turn out the way I thought it would." Hey! Join the fucking club, ok!? I thought I was going to be the starting center fielder for the Boston Red Socks. Life sucks, get a fucking helmet, allright?! "I'm not happy. I'm not happy." Nobody's happy, ok!? Happiness comes in small doses folks. It's a cigarette, or a chocolate cookie, or a five second orgasm. That's it, ok! You cum, you eat the cookie, you smoke the butt, you go to sleep, you get up in the morning and go to fucking work, ok!? That is it! End of fucking list! "I'm just not happy." Shut the fuck up, allright? That's the name of my new book, "Shut the Fuck Up, by Doctor Denis Leary. A revolutionary new form of therapy." I'm gonna have my patients come in. "Doctor, I.." "Shut the fuck up, next!" "I don't feel so.." "Shut the fuck up, next!" "He made me feel so much better about myself, you know? He just told me to shut the fuck up and nobody had ever told me that before. I feel so much better now." Whining fucking maggots.

Thank you Dennis Leary. I couldn't have said it better myself.

A title that means nothing.

Work has been going. Even though I work for the phone company I can honestly say that they SUCK. I can't say why until Monday. But I can say it will piss people off to no end.

I had one customer, a politician, call in totally pissed offed. It seems that he had no phone service and the repair crews had gone out to fix it. As if that wasn't bad enough. According to Mr. Politician the construction company doing work across the street from his office was run by the Mafia and they were out to get him. At this point I'm thinking that I've been to the town where he is and there's no way the mob would be after a useless jerk like him, unless of course he owes them drug money. His town is way to small to be of interest to the mafia. He then begins to rant about how the "street gangs" of "worthless teenagers" are out to get him as well. DUDE! There are only about 2500 people in your town! What's the gang consist of? Two high school students walking in your direction to get to the corner store?

Then there are the really stupid things that shouldn't happen. Things like people getting charged for the installation of 9 phone jacks, or having a $100 refund increase the bill, or people who wait a FUCKING MONTH! before calling in because no-one actually came to the door and said their new phone was connected. GAH!

Halloween!

Halloween has come and gone. Logan was dressed as Superman. We were only out for about an hour and a half. The best part of the night was the guy dressed as a scarecrow with a jack-o-lantern head. He was sitting in a chair in his driveway and his wife was handing out treats. As the kids would leave he'd make a grab at them and scare the bejeebers out of them. Logan bolted out of the driveway and down the sidewalk. We called him back and he was laughing, "He pranked me didn't he?" All we could do was laugh with him.

The worst thing about the night was coming home. Why? Because as soon as we got in and finished sorting the candy there was a Christmas commercial on TV. Carrie thought I flipped my lid when I started swearing for no apparent reason. Why the hell can't we have a day or two of quiet before the Christmas rush begins?

Other Stuff

I've been trying to get my hands on a copy of Call of Duty. The FIRST version of the game. There is a paintball mod for it. Even if it's kind of cheesy I don't care. It's multi player online and many of the forum members play. I think it'd be kind of fun to play against them. If you know of any place I can get a copy let me know.

THE BELLS! THE BELLS!!!

Well technically it's Bell and the ding, but what ever.

It's been a LONG week at the new job. I'm working for Bell Canada in the billing department. It's not overly difficult but it seems that I'm woefully under-trained. It feels like we "glanced" at all the tools we're supposed to use and "glimpsed" the information we need. Three weeks learning this stuff nad I'm spending more time with my hand in the air trying to flag down a "red-hat" (expierenced co-worker) and being taught how to do this shit.

Monday was the last day of class room training. Tuesday we hit the floor and went live. It wasn't too bad but I had guessed we got off lucky. That night as I was taking the bus home I mentioned to Janet (one of the ladies that trained with me) that we'd see the shit hit the fan later in the week. I was right.

Wedensday it seemed like every crackhead in Ontario had called in. Thursdy seemed to be more of the same. I actually had one guy call in complaining that he was over charged by ONE FUCKING PENNY! Buddy, if you're THAT worried over one cent get rid of your damned phone. I spent 20 minutes trying to explain to one person that long distance is charged by the minute or any part there of. If you call your kids and ask them to call back, that 15 second call is billed as 1 minute.

Today was pretty mellow. The shitty part of today came from the slush that dropped out of the sky. Too warm for real snow but this stuff was still white and in piled up in a few areas. Nothing to shovel. Fortunately the rain god rid of most of it.

Thank god it Friday.

Man! Am I nuts or what?

So last weekend my sister, Paula, arrived from Halifax for a visit. It's always nice to see her, especially if she brings a treat with her. An boy did she bring a treat. Tickets to Paramount Canada's Wonderland.

It's an amusment park. Lots of fun stuff to do.

Right off the bat I headed for the Extreme Sky Flyer. It cost me $45.00 for the ride and anopther $23.00 for the video but it's well worth it.

Ride Stats:
Arch Height: 173 ft
Tower Height: 152 ft
Free Fall: 50 ft
Closest point ot he ground: 6 ft
Top Speed: 60 mph!


Now, I used to be afraid of heights. Not phobic about it, just never liked it.
As I was being winched up to the top of the tower it would tug at my waist and it felt as though I were going to tip over and fall out of the harness.

If you listen closely to near the end you can hear Logan, my son, say i did a good job! LOL!


After that we went over to ther Top Gun Roller Coaster.

Carrie and I were in the front seat. Keep in mind that this is only her second time at Wonderland, and her second time on this ride. Hell her first ride was seven years ago and her first time on ANY roller coaster! First time, 7 years ago, they took pics of each seat set and we were about 5 seats back. This time they had eliminated that option. It's now a video of the front seats only. As you'll see in the video it's based off of the movie Top Gun (duh!) and simulates the flight charactreistics of a fighter plane! WOOT!

I have to give Carrie credit for doing this. Even though she was scared she held up pretty damned good!




Other than that've been busy at work training. 5 am is still too damned early to be up, but I'm on my last week of training and on the phones soon.

BUSY!!!!

So last Tuesday we went to Ottawa to see WWE Smackdown . It was a pretty decent show, Carrie was thrilled that Batista was there. There weere only two problems though.

The first probelm was that on the way home I missed our exit and we almost ended up in Cornwall. The other problem was worse, at least from Carrie's perspective.

Before we left Kingston we stopped into Shoppers Drugmart to pick up a couple of single use cameras. The Life brand (Shopper's house brand) ones were on sale so we got two of them. Last Wedensday we took them into be developed. They didn't. We ended up with only 2 or 3 images on the film. No Batista pics.

This past Friday we went to the Queen's Univerity vs Ottawa University hockey game. We had dinner there with a couple of the djs from the radio station. Queen's lost 8-2.

I started work on Monday. That's the good thing.

What sucks is that I have to be up at 5 am for 3 weeks so I can do a 25 minute walk to catch a bus downtown so I can be at work for 7 am. Once I'm there I have to climb up 3 flights of stairs to get to the 4th floor where the training room is.

Yesterday was REALLY bad. I'm not used to being up that early so I was tired as it was. Now let's add reading a few hundred pages of company policy, signing pay information and reading more legal crap.

Today I'm still a bit tired but at least we started the actual traing. That kind of helped keep me awake. 5:00 am is still WAY too early though.

The Worm has Turned!

I had a job interview today at StarTek, a local call center. I left thismorning at 11:00 am and didn't get home untill 4:00pm. LONG freaking day! But I got the job.

I'll start training on Sept. 25 at 7 am and that will take 3 weeks. So I'll be up at 5 am YUCK! After that though I'll be starting at 8am the earliest and done around 5:30. Pay is $10.00 an hour. Not the most I've ever made, but better than a kick balls.

When I finally got home I found out that St. Lawrence College sent me a letter of acceptence. If I take it I'd start school in January. I think I'll stick to work for now.

I think it's time to buy me a lotto ticket. Good things happen in 3's. Maybe I'll get REAL lucky.