And rightfully so it seems. And it all has to do with my extremely small, string on muscle relaxer, limp penis.
At least according to my junk mail box. Carrie would say otherwise of course, but why should I trust my loving wife? She doesn't flood my in box with 500 emails a week saying how strong and virile I am. So it must be true. I'm told I NEED and extra three inches at least 4 times a day and that I need about 40 lbs of Viagra type meds a week.
Based on my email I should have a schlong that measures...(3" x 4 times a day x 7 days a week x 52 weeks a year)... That's 192" or 16 feet long. DAMN! No wonder the wife isn't sexually satisfied.
That also explains why I need so much Viagra. God help me if I missed a dose. I'd be hard at both ends and limp in the middle.
Mind you If I followed their advice I'd start getting emails about me having a pencil dick.
On the plus side though I'm not fat. I don't any emails screaming that I need to lose 30 pounds fast.
I think I'm going to take my teeny weeny to the bathroom and cry now.
1 comment:
In a perfect world, spammers would get caught, go to jail, and share a cell with many men who have enlarged their penises, taken Viagra, and are looking for a new relationship.
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